the feeling of accomplishment (or lack thereof) has been a struggle for me right from my first few days here. almost immediately i realized that little of what i do here will have any tangible results. it's just the way the country works and the way which my work here plays out. there isn't anything tangible about it. that's hard for me; i really thrive off of finishing something.
it's been a bit of a constant internal battle.
a lot of my frustration in being here has centered around the lack of people to be action-oriented (see previous entry). so many times i have heard, "yes that sounds like a good idea; we should do that" and i reply, "yes! let's! when?" and they say, "yes! we should!" and it's ... it makes you want to tear your hair out. i had this wonderful vision that in my last few weeks here we would have a seminar about monitoring and how to do it and then go out and monitor the sanctuary.
because the sanctuary has been surveyed twice: 2003 and 2005. it's 2008. and it's only been surveyed for coral and a general fish census. twice. ever. in it's five years of existence. as a scientist, this makes me want to cry. not only should coral and fish be surveyed at LEAST twice a year, they should also be monitoring mangroves and seagrasses. how can you possibly tell if something is working if you don't monitor it? forget that they don't keep track of fish catch at all, which would, you know, probably be a good indication of how quickly the stocks around here are falling and how the catch per unit effort is quickly falling (i can tell this just from looking at the fish on my plate and listening to the guy who catches it talk. that's one guy, one family, not the whole municipality). but geeze this is a marine sanctuary! the very reason it exists is to allow coral to recover and fish to grow up – how can you possibly tell these if you're not actually checking up on how it's functioning every once in a while? and this includes coral, seagrasses, mangroves, and fish!
ok so the vision of my great seminar about monitoring just fell apart. forget it. six months isn't enough time to get anyone to get their act together enough to do this.
so, i figure, i'll just do it myself.
and then the weather has sucked and blah blah blah excuse excuse excuse. BUT this week, at the start of summer (supposedly begins here on february 1?) the weather has dramatically improved and the winds have changed and the sanctuary is once again snorkel-able and visibility is good.
so last week i did a mangrove assessment. and let me tell you – it felt freakin' wonderful to be out there wading around in water waist deep (whoops i miscalculated the tides a bit), counting trees, using transects, estimating height, percent crown cover. and then i came home, entered the data in excel, and poof! out came real tangible data about the condition of the mangroves (it's inbetween fair and good, by the by. better than i expected to be honest).
what can i say? i don't seem to be cut out for all this community organization stuff. i was doing real science and out there investigating the real situation and it was the best i've felt about any work i've done since i've been here.
and then this week scott and i have spent in the water – first doing a giant clam survey and then a coral one. and once again it feels like magic. it's a finished product.
what i hope, really hope, is that people here will see my poster with all the graphs and information on it and be like, "huh maybe that's important" and then go out and do it. it's not hard – there's nothing horribly technical about it and can honestly be done by anyone – it's just that someone needs to actually do it.
maybe it's selfish of me to just go ahead and do these things without the help of the community. but i feel like i've spent five months watching people not give a shit about anything that i've been doing in the sanctuary (ok there are a few exceptions as always, but the overwhelming majority). i feel possessive of the place. the agriculture office does nothing – they only use the hall when they need the space or it's convenient. and the local community just needs a strong local leader to get them to get it all together ... and they don't. and i'm transient, white, female, and i can't get them moving.
it has felt good this week.
so the struggle continues. i am ready to leave this country – sometimes i feel like i can no longer handle it, like i can no longer just laugh about how freakin' ridiculous this place is. but then i wonder how can i leave behind these problems and this sanctuary that has really become a large part of me; it has taught me a lot. and yet in two weeks i will leave this place and its problems will continue but will no longer be a part of my life. it feels weird.
No comments:
Post a Comment